Anthony Bitegeko
8/7/15
Blog Post #2
My favorite place to go is the most beautiful ballpark in Major League Baseball. The atmosphere
is just so amazing, and the smell of hotdogs and garlic fries make you want to go get some. The
feeling of the brisk air when you walk through the crowded hallways. When it starts raining you can
hear the squeak of a train track that brings the big umbrella like metal that roofs all of our heads to
keep us dry, but my absolute favorite part of my favorite place is the soft padded seats, to enjoy the
beautiful game of americas pastime.
I, too, love the feel of a ballpark and a good ball game. Always a highlight of my summers. However, your description was weak. I didn't really see a lot of show vs. tell, more of just tell. Give a stronger description. Embrace your five senses. Elaborate with your details.
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